Following from a discussion that we had last night with Dr. No, Lauren and I decided to find out who the crack psychologists at Quizilla think we would be if we were, indeed, Jem and the Holograms.

I should point out that I have little to no memory of most of these characters. I know. I'm ashamed of myself.

The quiz result:

Congratulations you are Kimber!
Which Character from Jem and the Holograms Are You?

Kimber's bio, from the oddest and best Web site ever:

Kimber Benton: She's the youngest Hologram (20ish) and therefore has a tendency to act impulsively, but she has a large heart, and it really shows up in her music writing. She plays keyboards and guitar in the band.

Which song would that be, exactly, that shows her big heart? "Broadway Magic," or "Gimme Gimme Gimme"? Maybe it was "Aztec Enchantment." Or "Come On In, The Water's Fine." Yes, Kimber -- who is not loved enough for the family to remember her real age, so she's just 20-ish in perpetuity -- truly does have hidden depths. Impressive.

Dr. No, however, hooked his arm around my shoulders and said, "I think you're Jetta, from the Misfits."

Here's her bio:

Jetta: She came from England to play Saxophone for the band. She is the newest member of the Misfits who joined when Raya joined the Holograms. She is a pathological liar, and loves to hurt people, so she fit in like a (bad luck) charm.

"I love that I can tell you that you're a pathological liar, and you love to hurt people, and that you're okay with it," Dr. No said, forgetting that I'm apparently a pathological liar.

He was kidding, though. Or is that me lying again?

And:

Jetta (Sheila Burns): Comes from a lower class family in England, but claims to be a close friend of the royalties of England. She first played with the group the Tinkerbillies, who came to the USA but were so obnoxious that they got kicked out of the country by the immigration department. She later met the Misfits while performing at a club in the USA, while the Misfits were looking for a new member. Pizzazz used her father's money and influence to get a resident card for Jetta. She now plays saxophone in the Misfits.

I love it. I was deported by immigration for being obnoxious, because the government likes to intervene in the rock-music world, especially when them foreigners are getting rude. Do you know how many celebrities would get the boot if only we lived in Jem's world? Colin Farrell would be in Siberia by now.

Unfortunately, Lauren and I are going to have to throw down, because the folks at Quizilla don't think I'm Jetta at all. They think Lauren and I are both Roxy.

You're Roxy! You usually just follow the leader and
rarely do things on your own, but when you do
it's a great feeling to be independent. Of
course you need some help with your school
work, and listening skills, but you've got the
drive to go for it! It's up to you to
accomplish your goals.
Which Misfit Are You?

Here's Roxy's bio:

Roxy: She is the toughest member of the Misfits. She is hard to the core. If she wants something, NOTHING will stand in her way. She is one uncontrollable person.

And, Lauren and I are both illiterate:

Roxy (Roxanne Pelligrini): She has been poor most of her life, and never learned to read. She ran away from her home in Philadelphia when she was 13 years old, and took a number of minor jobs as waitressing, before joining the Misfits on guitar.

So. Aren't you glad we shared?

And no, I was not caught last night going, "WAIT, who would Jessica be?" And Dr. No did not, therefore, have to say ,"Um. She's Jem. You know, how that inspired all this?"

Nope. Didn't happen.

Someone got here by searching for: HOW TO USE A BIDET Bowling: Not well, but not badly. More on that later. Reading: Shallow, shallow magazines. Spotted: Tween queen Hilary Duff making out with that doofus Aaron Carter at the bowling alley. They started cheering when an *NSYNC song came on, like, way to be loyal to your brother's band, Aaron.