Name = Heather. I won�t tell you my last name; it�s naughty.

Birthday = August 16, 1977, a mere three months from my roommate�s. This means I have a great deal of wisdom to impart to her, so that she might benefit from my advanced development.

Piercings = Two in each earlobe

Tattoos = None. I�m too indecisive and I know I�d end up wishing I hadn�t done it. But for the record, I�d probably get a Union Jack or a wee, wee green four-leaf clover.

Height = 5�5�, or 5�4.75� when I�m being honest.

Shoe size = 7.5, on average. My left foot is almost a half-size bigger than my right.

Hair color = Great question. No one knows. Some call me a redhead, some a blonde; I suppose I have blondish-brown hair with red glints in it. And it�s loosely curly.

Eye color = Blue

Length = Chin-length right now, though I�ve worn it past my shoulders for the past four years and I think I like that better.

Last...

� movie you rented = Woody Allen�s Love and Death; we rented Amelie too but never got around to watching it. This was when I was in NYC; generally, I never go to the video store.

� song you listened to = "A Little Respect,� by Wheatus

� song that was stuck in your head = "Last Dance With Maryjane" by Tom Petty just gave way about ten minutes ago to �Gloria.�

� song you downloaded = An acoustic version of �Ants Marching� from an early and rare Dave Matthews bootleg.

� CD you bought = The Chicago soundtrack and Norah Jones� Come Away With Me.

� CD you listened to = Now That�s What I Call Music, Vol. 50, from England, and a CD mix I made. They alternate in my CD player right now.

... person you've called = Hunky Cameraman

... person who's called you = Lauren

Do ...

� you have a bf or gf = Technically, no. He�d say he doesn�t, either, so I guess that�s the answer. No, I don't have a boyfriend. Yet I do consider myself involved with someone, simply because no one�s denying that there�s some pretty strong feelings even if we�re not labeling them as anything.

� you wish you could live somewhere else = Yes. Always.

... you think about suicide = No.

� others find you attractive = I guess, but rarely are they people I would want to date. The last guy to find me attractive was drunk, possibly drooling, definitely licking my hand in an effort to woo me, and moaning, �We need to be together. Please. I need you. We HAVE to date� � despite the fact that we were there in the first place because two weeks ago he hooked up with one of my friends and she was deciding whether he was worth the effort. I�d say the answer is a definitive no. He mistook �disinterested sarcasm� as �cutting through the bullshit.� Poor boy.

� you want more piercings = Not sure. I don�t deal well with pain. I could go for a third hole in one of my ears, but I�d just as soon spend the money on something else.

... you want more tattoos = See above � no pain threshold, and a short attention span. I can�t even find a city I want to live in, let alone get an agonizing, indelible mark on my skin that would hurt even more to erase.

... you drink = With gusto.

... you do drugs = Nah. One vice at a time, please, and drinking does me just fine.

... you like cleaning = No. I like when things are clean, but I derive no pleasure from making them get that way.

� you like roller coasters = Not really. I got kind of into Space Mountain once at Disneyworld, but generally, I don�t trust them, and more importantly I don�t trust my stomach. Nor do I trust yours.

... you write in cursive or print = A hybrid. I�m too lazy to write in perfect cursive or in perfect print; melding them is a lot easier. I guess my particular hybrid is heavier on the cursive side.

For or against...

� long distance relationships = For. I think people are worth the risk; obviously, they�re not ideal, and they shouldn�t be permanent, but I think for a period they can actually help strengthen some ties and you shouldn�t give up on someone just because of geography. Separation is not a permanent condition.

� using someone = In theory, against, but we all do it, whether it�s for something benign as feedback or for something more intimate, like sex. I don�t think everyone means to do it, but everyone does, in one way or another. As such, I don�t think �using� someone is always necessarily as underhanded as it sounds; however, I am against leading people on deliberately and for really hurtful purposes.

... suicide = I feel like I should put forth something quasi-intelligent about how we all have freedom of expression, and if someone chooses suicide that means they�re simply exercising their right to live and die and make a statement and own their own futures, but� holy hell, of course I�m against suicide. I think it�s horrible.

... killing people = That is the stupidest question ever.

... teenage smoking = I would be against my teenagers smoking, and I choose not to, so I guess that�s my answer. I am not, however, out campaigning for an end to cigarettes, and I think most of those �The Truth� ads are a steaming pile of horse shit.

... doing drugs = Feh. Generally, I think drugs are idiotic, and that anyone who says they enhance life and creativity are kidding themselves. I wouldn�t date anyone who did anything hard � if they�ve tried it, maybe that�s one thing, but if they seek to do it again, that�s asking for trouble. I�d prefer to be with someone who casually just doesn�t bother with them, because that�s the way I am. But I suppose if I met someone fab who was like, �A couple times a year my friends and I do shrooms,� or whatever, I�d deal with it based on how much I liked that person.

... premarital sex = Hell yes. You get yours, people.

... driving drunk = No. I think that�s the dumbest thing in the world, and I have zero patience for people who are like, �Trust me, I�m better at driving when I�m drunk.� It�s like, �No, you�re not, you�re just better at kidding yourself when you�re drunk.�

... gay/lesbian relationships = Definitely.

... soap operas = Of course. I mean, hi, Passions just introduced a mysterious shed into a character�s life -- yes, a SHED -- so that he can run around and scream, �WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THE SHED?!?� and �Sorry to yell at you � I�m just not used to people asking me about The Shed.� That�s fucking brilliant.

Favorite...

... food = Indian. I�ve developed a total obsession with Chicken Tikka Masala and garlic naan bread; it helps that I have happy memories from London of eating Indian food and drinking Strongbow and chatting with local lager louts. Great trip.

... song = God, I don�t have one. That�s an impossible question. I don�t pick favorites easily.

... thing to do = Travel. Laugh. I like to get all my friends together and relax and chat and chill and chuckle over a few ciders. I like to ski and play tennis, but I�m neither good at both nor a frequent participant in either. I also like to shower, but that�s a hygiene thing, not a hobby. I love watching Notre Dame football, or indeed any football.

... thing to talk about = I�d be lying if I said I didn�t love gossiping. I don�t think I have a favorite topic; my favorite things to talk about are the things that are organic and fun in that given moment. Lauren and I had a really funny conversation the other day about what toys we used to play with when we were little, how we played with them, weird �let�s pretend� stuff when we were young, etc. That was a great one that ranks high on my list, but it�s not like we sit down every night and try to pick up the thread again. It was great because it was so out there and random.

... sports = college football and basketball, tennis, NFL football, Everton football (Go Blue! Down with the Red Shite!), Olympic swimming, track, gymnastics, and ice skating. Probably in that order.

... drinks = Diet Coke. Woodchuck/Woodpecker/Strongbow/Blackthorn cider. Water. Orange juice. Margaritas. Some beers. Mostly, I�m padding this list to downplay my total devotion to Diet Coke, which will always be my one and only. I love you, baby! I couldn�t have done this without you. Come to mama.

... clothes = Jeans, a sweater or long-sleeved t-shirt, and a coat.

... movies = Fuck. Um, Annie Hall, When Harry Met Sally, A Room With A View, North By Northwest, Clue, Airplane!, Chicago for the music, baby, Gone With The Wind because it just rules and �Tara�s Theme� is my favorite movie piece of all time� do I have to keep doing this? I�ll end up listing half the movies I�ve ever seen. I reek at these.

... band[s] = U2, Dave Matthews Band (sorry, haters, but I think he still has some good songs), Tragically Hip, David Gray (not really a band, though, I guess), The Smiths. Again, can I stop? Reekage.

... holiday = Christmas, bar none. Thanksgiving is fun, too, but nothing comes close to Christmas. It lasts for more than a month, sometimes, the music is fantastic, and it turns even cold weather into something magical. And there are PRESENTS. So many presents.

... people = Anyone who doesn�t make me want to rip out my own teeth. I could give the �friends and family� answer, and it would be true, but I feel like that�s an answer everyone should give.

Have you...

... ever cried over a girl or guy = Oh yeah. If you haven�t, I think you�re in the minority. Nothing to be ashamed of there.

... ever lied to someone = Oh yeah. The phrase, �He�s sleeping on the couch� comes to mind. Plus, of course, the patented, �Sure, I have renter�s insurance!�

... ever been in a fist fight = No. I once accidentally kicked a girl in the crotch and punched a guy in the nose � two separate occasions � but generally, I avoid stuff like that because I�m a giant coward.

... ever been arrested = No, and let�s hope it stays that way.

What...

... shampoo do you use = Honestly? Head and Shoulders, just to be safe. But I sometimes use Pantene�s curl defining shampoo and Herbal Essences� pink stuff. Guys always love the way that one smells.

... perfume do you use = None. I have an orange/vanilla/brown sugar thing that sometimes is nice, but usually I forget. On nice occasions I�ll use Clinique Happy. My favorite perfume was the Bath & Body Works �Leo� scent, but they discontinued that ages ago and it makes me sad.

... shoes do you wear = Boots or something else with a chunky heel. I�ll wear sandals out of necessity but it makes me uncomfortable and I spent the entire time feeling self-conscious about my feet, and whether I have an abnormally large big toe. I don�t really think I do, but sometimes that sucker just pops right out at me and starts to laugh, and that hurts me.

... are you scared of = Anything happening to my eyes, drowning, sharks� basically, I hate thinking about prolonged deaths. When I go, I think it�s going to need to be so quick that I don�t have time to be like, �Well, okay, I�m about to die� any second now, I�ll kick it� almost there�� I�m also generally terrified of not being enough � for someone else, and for myself.

... is your boss like = My immediate bosses for the next ten weeks seem really supportive, chilled-out and cool, and together. I�m really happy in that regard. One has a beard, the other is pregnant. My boss above them has blue streaks in her hair. Love her, too.

Number...

... of times I have been in love = Twice

... of guys I have kissed = Not sure. Twelve? Fifteen? Fifteen. I can't tell if that's average or very, very few.

... of girls I have kissed = Two, Lauren and Jessica, but they weren�t real smooches � like, we weren�t moved by passion or hot mutual attraction, or anything else that would get a guy�s rocks off. We weren�t getting down and dirty, although the photo of me and Lauren sure makes it look otherwise. But we were drunk and it was New Year�s and there was a camera and it was funny.

... of continents I have lived in = I think this is a trick question for me. The answer is one, right, because I�ve lived in North America and in Great Britain, but Britain is not a continent and doesn�t count as part of the continent of Europe. If New Zealand can be country without a continent � they will kill you if you try to claim they�re Australia � then I think Great Britain can be too. And while I�m at it, Hawaii�s not part of the continental US -- it�s a chain of islands -- so if you live in Hawaii, can you claim you lived in North America simply by association? I don�t think you can. I think, if you�re been born and raised in Hawaii and never left, that you�ve never, in fact, lived in a continent. These are trying questions indeed. They�re bigger than I am.

� of cheap diary entries like this that I am going to do before writing a real one = I can�t say. I need to get my mojo back; it�s on a lunch break. That�s lasted for three days.

Someone got here by searching for: �Sex with George Clooney� and �Topher Grace skinny� Watching: The NCAA Basketball finals Did Roy Williams really swear on live television? Yep. He tore Bonnie Bernstein a new asshole for asking if he�d be accepting the North Carolina job, then said, �I don�t give a SHIT about North Carolina right now.� Okay, there, Roy. Calm down. And possibly, kiss goodbye to the Tar Heels. Wait, where are you going? To the shed.